The Playful Way: How Piera Gelardi Approaches Parenting in the Digital Age Through Wonder and Joy
Parenting in the digital age doesn't have to be a drag. Piera Gelardi, founder of Refinery29 and Nooma Looma, shows us how play can be at the center of parenting.
Creative entrepreneur Piera Gelardi is a play connoisseur. She’s built an entire career off the idea of play - between her media empire Refinery29, popular Substack NoomaLooma, and 185K strong following on Instagram. Many of us think of play as something frivolous that can only be enjoyed sparingly, but Piera doesn’t buy into that narrative.
Piera integrates play into all areas of her life, even parenting. In an age where parents are increasingly anxious about screen time and digital engagement, Piera thinks play might be what saves us all. Rather than viewing technology as a threat to childhood creativity, the entrepreneur and mother approaches digital parenting through the lens of wonder, curiosity, and creative imagination.
Parent Tech Action Coalition co-founder Larissa May sat down with Piera to learn more about how she transforms potential digital pitfalls into opportunities for playful connection.
LM: I know your most important job in the world is being Viva's parent. I'd love for you to tell us a little bit about your family and your magical unit.
PG: My family is myself, my partner, Philippe, and my six-year-old daughter, Viva. It took us about seven years to bring Viva forth in the world so the journey to parenthood was quite an emotional roller coaster. When she was born, it was truly the most joyful moment in my life.
Viva just turned 6, she just lost her first tooth. She’s very humorous, creative, and lively —like her name. She's got a stand-up comedian in here and is constantly workshopping jokes and testing limits through comedy. We love doing all kinds of art, cooking, creative projects at home, and then going on different kinds of active adventures out in the world.
I was really worried that being a parent would sort of diminish my creativity. But Viva is my greatest play and creativity teacher — I learn so much from being in her presence and following her lead.
LM: From what I know about Viva, she's a very curious being. Do you remember when Viva first had a curiosity or a desire to explore the digital world?
PG: She noticed screens since she was very little and has always been curious about them. It’s a balancing act between letting her be curious and see technology as a tool we use in our modern lives and being overly fixated or seeing it as the most interesting thing. I try to pay attention to how much I look at my phone when I’m with her — she definitely notices when my attention is on my device and not on her. Some tech uses feel better than others — her asking my Apple watch for facts about sharks feels a lot better than getting sucked into a YouTube hole.
LM: I think one thing you do really well as a parent is you preserve the magic and even in the things that are scary, you make them, even for adults, very digestible and not scary. You’'ll treat a run like a scavenger hunt.
PG: Right.
LM: And I'm really curious as Viva is now growing into herself, first and foremost, but also growing into the digital world, how do you cultivate that spirit of wandering in the digital world and capturing wonder and awe with Viva? What are the types of playful practices that you guys have engaged in together as you've introduced her into that?
PG: As a parent, it's always been important for me to approach things playfully which, to me, means approaching things with a spirit of curiosity and creativity. My favorite parenting book is a book of play therapy activities for parents. It's full of different playful games that you can do with kids to help them to develop regulation, connect with their body, and connect with you. I try and approach all of life and especially parenting through a similar lens of playful exploration.
When it comes to exploring the digital world with my daughter, I try to use it in a way where it's satisfying our curiosity. So often, we'll kind of go on a wonder wander to YouTube to get craft ideas - watch someone make something so that we get more ideas for our own creative practice. Like this weekend she wanted to make our own crayons so we watched a few videos and then melted down our own broken crayons. That's one way that I hope I can teach her to engage with technology - rooted in finding inspiration and delight. I also want her to see that there's a choice in how you engage with the digital world, that it's not just one thing.
LM: What would you say is in your digital playground survival kit when you're trying to get Viva from that screen meltdown moment? You have all of these tools.
PG: I mean screens are addictive, so it's very hard once a child is on an iPad for them to pull away - same as it's hard for us to put our phone down. I definitely think that handling those transition moments playfully is the best tool in my toolbox. So instead of just saying “Your iPad time is over, let's take it away,” I'll say, “Hey, do you want to build a pillow fort for the stuffies?” Or “Hey, do you want to have a drawing challenge with me?”
Before I say the screen time is over, I quickly think about what play activity I can offer that I have the capacity to do right now. It can’t always be something elaborate but I can pull out a toy that I know she likes or point her to our Lazy Susan of colored pens she can draw with.
I also have an acronym that I like to use when I’m in a moment of conflict or my child is not cooperating. It's PLAY:
P is for pause. Just pause and notice what's happening.
L is for lighten. So that could be take a breath, make a joke, move, anything that's going to lighten the energy and give you a moment.
A is for accept. Then you accept what's happening. My kid doesn't want to want to put down their iPad.
Y is for yes. You ask yourself, yes, and. That's the moment of trying to reach into your play jar and think about what else can I offer. What else could I do to kind of shift the moment? This is when you go into play mode after having taken a pause.
LM: What’s a screen-free activity or game that’s a hit in your house right now?
We love playing drawing games together. Our current favorites are:
“Body Colors” which is my daughter’s name for the Surrealist game “Exquisite Corpse” where you fold a paper in 3. The first person draws the head and folds it so the next person only sees the neck lines, they draw the body and fold it so the next person only sees the hip lines and the last person draws the legs and reveals the full character.
We also play “Mash Ups.” We name two people or stuffies and the person has to draw a mash up. Mona (the stuffed bunny) and Papa is “Mopa” and you have to draw the hybrid.
We also do “Mirror.” You draw a line down the middle of the paper. One person draws the left half and then gives it to the other person to draw the mirror right side: copying as closely as they can.
LM: Lastly, if you gave parents one quick tip to make parenting in the digital age more playful, what would it be? Not for the play experts, but maybe for the people that feel like they don't even know how to attach to play. How do you tap into that?
A lot of parents tell me they hate to play with their kids, and I get it. Parenting is tough, there are so many responsibilities, and often we have totally lost touch with our playfulness.
I’d say start by reconnecting with your own playful spirit. What did you love as a kid? Were you the one making up silly songs? Building blanket forts? Creating elaborate stories? That playful spirit, it’s still in you - it just needs permission to emerge. Now as an adult: What makes the time fly by and your spirit soar? What would you do for fun if you had all the time in the world?
When we can reconnect with the kind of play that we enjoy, we can bring that into our parenting and find forms of play that both us and our kids can enjoy.
We all have unique play personalities — some of us are movers and shakers who love feeling their body in motion, some of us are expressive creators who enjoy making things, some of us are curious questers who love learning. Know that playfulness isn’t one size fits all and that just because you may not like playing dolls or board games doesn’t mean you’re not a playful person.
When we can reconnect with the kind of play that we enjoy, we can bring that into our parenting and find forms of play that both us and our kids can enjoy.
LM: Where can people find you if they want to hear more from you?
You can follow me on Instagram or my Substack, Nooma Looma.
The Bottom Line
Technology doesn't have to be a source of conflict – it can be an opportunity for playful connection when approached with creativity and intention. To make digital parenting more enjoyable for everyone, parents should reconnect with their own sense of play to then use in interactions with their children.
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Thanks for having me! As a parent, technology can feel really scary and I appreciate the ways in which you're educating, demystifying, and PLAY-ifying it for families.